Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Kill your laptop

After guests and going out of town and Baby Y being very ill, I realize I've hardly turned on my computer over the past week. It's fantastic. I've been reading.

Ironically, one of the the things I've been reading (finally) is Lowenstein's book on Buffett who was certainly not tethered to a computer ... Excel ... Bloomberg ... Facebook. On that note ... good night! (And turn off your computer already :)

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

So. Is it worth it?

Unfortunately for the empirically minded there is no satisfactory answer to this. There is no parallel me running around without an MBA to make a comparison against.

As the twelve months of gloom lifted and finals came and went and I enjoyed graduation, I was increasingly inclined to say that it was unequivocally worthwhile. However, I was also past the point of return. There was no point in regretting anything.

The friends I've made at Booth are phenomenal. I feel glad I have Chicago Booth at the top of my resume during this terrible job hunt. It's relieving to have alumni to reach out to and career services to hold my hand when needed. I did have some fantastic professors. And I even learned something in my worst classes. And most of the learning in MBA land really happens outside of the classroom I now believe.

However, the worth of something cannot be judged properly without considering the price paid. And this will vary dramatically across applicants - both the tangible price such as tuition and the intangibles such as living away from family. As you listen to graduates hold forth on the value of their MBA, keep this in mind. We all pay different prices and obtain different rewards.Having now finished, I see how naive it was to assume that someone else's MBA story would be my own. (And the irony is that anyone who is going to get into a top MBA program is probably going to do pretty well on their own. )

But in all honesty, I think it would be quite short sighted of me to say that I regretted it.

Monday, June 22, 2009

Full-time vs. Part-time MBA

Here's an easy MBA post in response to a question I got from a reader last week, written mainly from the Booth perspective.

If I had lived in or near to a city with a top program I probably would have done a part-time program. I also considered executive programs. But it definitely is a very different experience from a full-time program and I have to say I am glad that I went full-time.

At Booth, there is no academic difference between the part-time and full-time programs. It's the exact same faculty and you can take class at either campus (with some restrictions). Both programs also have a considerable amount of flexibility in how quickly or slowly they complete their studies. Both programs participate in the same graduation ceremony and get to participate in on campus recruiting. (Ask career services for the fine print on part-time participation though.) (I think they have a different admissions team?? Anyone know this for sure?)

The big difference comes in the way of the student experience. There is definitely a different feel in the Gleacher classes. Virtually all part-time students are working jobs which gives them much less time to devote to study groups and social events. (The guy who hired me for my internship came out of the part-time program and called us full-timers a bunch of slackers ... and he's right :) They are real adults with, you know, jobs and families. The part-time program has a separate set of student groups. (Some cross-registration is allowed but mostly the two programs stick to themselves on this one.) And to the extent that networking and social stuff is a huge piece of the MBA value - then it seems like they miss out. One only has so many hours in the day.

In sum, if you want the full student experience and aren't up for the work/school/life grind, I would do the full-time program. If your employer will foot the bill for a part-time program only/you can't bear to part with your paycheck/you are worried you might graduate unemployed in the worst recession in recent history/you just want the degree and some classes, then I would do the part-time program. But, at least at Booth, the line between the programs is a bit blurry, so keep that in mind.

That's my two cents.

Hot damn, it's hot around these parts. Chicago was not meant to be lived in sans A/C. By the way, just discovered the best bagels ever ... in Hyde Park! Wish I could take them with.

Life these days

Was about to pen one of my uber serious posts but don't have the brain power (lucky for you). Really, I should definitely be sleeping.

I am now a "single mom" (when my mom isn't here, that is). The good news is that Y has a job (with a real pay check and a not crazy boss). The bad news is that he doesn't live in Chicago any more.

Happy Father's Day!!

I am very much looking for a job. But also trying to enjoy the kids and summer. And the last month of Hyde Park. But really, it has become really impossible to imagine that I will ever be employed again. Sigh.

Baby Y's bday is upcoming and I just made a gorgeous double chocolate layer cake that I am planning on bedecking with June strawberries tomorrow morning. That and some delicious crustless quiches, one with and one without mushrooms, fresh fruit salad and bagels etcetera will be make for a lovely Monday. Can you believe he's almost two years old?? He's as old as my MBA ;)

Baby X is the most amazing sleeper ever but I think we deserve a good sleeper after what we went through with the first!

Happy Summer Solstice!!

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Yeah. It was worth it.

More on that later.

(And no, I don't have a job yet.)

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Congratulations Class of 2009

Graduation was on Sunday. I'm very glad my mom asked me to walk - I had a great time and it was a nice way to end things. I will really really miss a number of amazing people I had the good fortune to spend the last 2 years with. :(

Friday, June 12, 2009

Women are people too

Obviously. But maybe not.

I think of myself as a human being who happens to be a woman. One would think that this is rather obvious but our every day language suggests otherwise.

If women (especially women with children) are just people then why do we not have daddy bloggers or dadpreneurs or daddy MBAs? Why is there no 50 Most Powerful Men in Business or the Gentlemen's Professional Golf Association or "men's issues"?*

Ok - so these are rhetorical question - I understand why but the fact that we are so used to this language pattern is very meaningful.

There are two reactions to this state of affairs. The first (and more common among my childless peers) reaction is to avoid any special labels or preferential treatment by gender. This would include eschewing women's organizations, decrying gender based merit scholarships, and doing everything to reiterate the idea that men and women have few meaningful differences.

I am highly sympathetic to this approach but there are two problems. First, is that it verges on reinforcing the idea that male = normal and non-male = aberration. This would be the panelist at a women's conference who exclaimed "Men don't sit around discussing 'work-life balance'!" (Who cares! I'm discussing it! And btw men like to have lives outside of work too. But again, who cares what "men" are allegedly not discussing???) This woman then went on to encourage us to read Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office (or was it Play Like a Woman, Win Like a Man ... or similar obnoxious title?) Perhaps these books have a more interesting and nuanced message inside but I can not get past the loaded titles. This would also be the fellow female student who in a round table discussion on the meaning of CWiB (our student women's group here at Booth) declared somewhat randomly "I'm not on the mommy track!" (Am I on the "mommy track". What the hell is the "mommy track" anyway?)

But there is a second more important problem with this approach: sans babies gender is a completely useless distinction.** But when it comes to babies gender is makes a huge difference and trying to pretend that you are just like everyone else as a woman with children is a great way to drive yourself to despair. (As I have slowly realized.)

Last year I attended a talk by a very well-known woman (former executive at now collapsing enormo-bank) who responded to a question about family/career issues by first saying "Men cover your ears" and then went on to imply that men would not be interested in this side conversation.

But these are not "women's issues". These are "human issues". Motherhood is a fundamental human experience. I think you can simultaneously stand up for the idea that men and women are mostly similar but also incredibly different without undermining social progress.

This was all a preface to say that I'm finally going to post a series of thoughts on gender and babies over the next week or so that have been rattling around in my head for 2+ years. But don't for a moment think that they are a side conversation! If you are a women, have known a woman (or have never known a woman ;) They are for you.


*A search for "daddy blogger" returns about 4 million hits compared to 20.6 million for "mommy blogger", similar story for the other terms.
**I take the somewhat radical position that there is just as much intra-gender as there is inter-gender variation therefore one cannot make meaningful predictions about intelligence, behavior and career prospects based on gender alone. Do men and women have real biological differences that impact behavior? Yes. But in a civilized society where intelligence is more critical than brute force for professional success, I'm not convinced that it matters.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Two Year Academic Wrap Up

For better or worse, here is how I used the flexible curriculum for two years. (FYI - I remember all of my courses by the course number not the name so am not using the official name for all of them.)

1st Year - Fall
30116 Footnote Accounting w/Skinner*
35200 Corporate Finance w/Seru*
33501 International Commercial Policy w/Levchenko**

1st Year - Winter
37000 Marketing Strategy w/Dhar
30118 M&A Accounting w/Bens
33032 Managing the Workplace w/Kole

1st Year - Spring
34106 Commercializing Innovation w/Meadow
35120 Portfolio Management w/Pastor*** (requires Matlab)
42001 Competitive Strategy w/Knez
41202 Time Series w/Tsay (requires R)
(not a schedule I would recommend to anyone let alone with someone with a 9 month old who just finished a grueling 6 month recruiting season)

2nd Year - Fall
35100 Financial Instruments w/Nosal*
30117 Taxes w/Weiss
30130 FSA w/Smith*

2nd Year - Winter
38114 Business Ethics w/Fogel
35210 International Corporate Finance w/Rajan***
38002 Managerial Decision Making w/Wu
42115 Building Innovation Strategy and Capability w/Tennant
40000 Operations w/Debo

2nd Year - Spring
40110 Managing Service Operations w/Eisenstein
34102 New Venture Strategy w/the one and only Schrager

*much will be review for someone with the CFA designation or prior accounting/finance experience but can be worth taking especially if you get a good professor but if you want skip to concentrate on other areas, you'll be fine.
**review for anyone with solid undergraduate Econ background that includes international trade coursework
***Pastor and Rajan are brilliant - course worth it just for the value that they add but much of the technical stuff is not new news if you have a finance background. I don't regret taking these courses though and it still was plenty of work.

Tuesday, June 09, 2009

Re Discovering My Self

(major post backlog is losing to major life to do list backlog. finals week. graduation this sunday which i am attending solely for my mom's benefit. opting for less ponderous post in the interest of expediency)

The hardest thing about the past 12 months I've realized is not knowing what it is that I wanted.

For the first half of my internship last summer I was thrilled. Except for the less than ideal (but acceptable) geographic location, the position and firm were perfect and the perfect capstone to many, many years of preparation. Then, as things began to get more tense and strange on the desk (I'll not belabor the details), I was shocked to discover one summer evening that I was pregnant. (I thought all the free food was just making me fat!) When I returned to work the next day the firm had just instituted the first layoffs in its history. My little team of 4 was now a team of 2. I knew I would not be coming back.

I've begun to wonder if my abrupt turn against IM was a way to protect myself from the reality of job hunting as a pregnant woman in a collapsing market.

As I return to some semblance of my pre-maternal self, I realize my metamorphosis is not only physical but also mental. It's nice.

Thursday, June 04, 2009

Happy Thursday!

  • Thursday is my favorite day. Almost almost the weekend.
  • The sun has finally arrived in Chicago.
  • Tomorrow is the last class of my MBA career
  • Baby X is starting to notice the world
  • Baby Y is obsessed with the alphabet ... that's what Sesame Street will do you apparently :)
  • I am watching Wall Street as a homework assignment ...
Have a wonderful weekend, everyone!

Wednesday, June 03, 2009

Dealing with MBA Entitlement

I was catching up a few weeks ago with the alumnus who hired me last summer. (He is still at the fund but confirms that it's still brutal in IM land.) Towards the end of the conversation we discussed the fact that a sense of MBA entitlement was counterproductive these days and yet it is awfully hard to escape.

Last autumn I wasn't ready to compromise as I saw many of my classmates doing. I wanted to keep my options open. Now, I hugely regret that stubbornness. I wish I had just taken any old corporate job and been done with it. I've been job hunting more or less for 3 years. I have no more enthusiasm for this game and no more faith in an ultimate payoff.

It's final dawned on me that the reason I was so resistant to returning to Seattle is that it felt like the ultimate admission that I had just made full circle without anything (yet?) to show for it. After all, one of my primary reasons to get an MBA was to get out of Seattle. W/o the MBA my husband and I would both be gainfully employed homeowners, enjoying our children, getting exercise, taking the occasional vacation. W/ MBA we are roughly half a million poorer (tuition, childcare and foregone earnings for both of us), hoping we can get something roughly as good as what we had before, unsure of what we can afford in rent and too busy getting our lives together behind our laptops to pay attention to our children.

Hopefully with time the value will become apparent but the point is to say that MBA entitlement arises not just because the folks who get the MBA are just schmucks (though you can't rule that out entirely ;) but when you pay such a price you really want something big in return. And while the advice to humble oneself and get to work resonates with me, (after all that's what I was doing pre MBA), having spent so much money and time already and having two little ones that I'd like to spend some time with, makes this an increasingly bitter pill to swallow. If the qualities that will make me successful post MBA are just those that I possessed pre MBA - what was I paying for?

I went into this degree with eyes wide open to the financial risks that it entailed and the potential ramifications to my family. (And the '01-'02 MBA job market was still a fresh reminder.) I thought it would be worth it as my ticket to hedge fund land. And it may never be. Which is frankly the best lesson of all. I did not sufficiently hedge my risks* and I let greed blind my inner Eeyore.

In investing and in entrepreneurship losses are to be expected, so hopefully I'm more prepared for that reality than before. And I do believe that things are more likely than not to get better for me from here. But even more than before, I concur that for a happier life, shake off your misplaced optimism. (Passed on by the alumnus just before our chat.)

*Such hedges would have been applying to a broader range of programs and choosing the lowest cost provider. Applying to programs earlier before children. Doing a part-time program. Taking my employer up on sponsoring me for an executive or part-time program. Compromising on employers for the sake of security/stability. Etc.

Monday, June 01, 2009

Regrets, Reflections and Responsible Blogging

I started this blog in 2006 essentially as a letter to myself. It was to be the blog I wished existed then. But as my fortunes became tied to the Booth brand, this became more complicated. What I have tried to resolve for myself over the past month or so is to what extent I want to speak freely about this experience and to what extent I should. What do I owe myself? What do I owe the school? And what do I owe to the younger me's out there? And what is worth saying?

I realize now that it is difficult for prospective students to get a frank view of the MBA experience because it is so difficult for insiders to speak frankly. When I was speaking officially for admissions I was completely sincere but very guarded in my comments. I never mentioned the hard parts and over the two years I began to feel guilty for portraying this experience in such a one-sided manner. Students who are not sufficiently warned about the hard parts are likely to be far more disappointed. So, for better or worse, this blog was a space for me to come clean. (And while it is true that my less flattering comments are my opinion, not fact, this is just as true of my or anyone's flattering opinions as well.)

But if competing schools don't have frank bloggers airing complaints, it's not particularly balanced. And it can be hard to discern as a blogger when to convey a strong opinion and when to let the moment pass - what is worth sharing and what should be ignored.

One reason I chose Booth was that I found the students to be very genuine. At some schools I felt like they were reading off a script. I think the views about business school in general and Booth in particular, within the Booth community are more nuanced, unexpected and diverse than an outsider might expect.

I somewhat regret starting this blog in the first place and I regret blogging specifically about Booth. Far more interesting is the discussion of the value and place of a business education, gender and babies in an MBA world, the moral complexities of the pursuit of money, etc. If you think this is interesting too, stay tuned ...