Saturday, April 05, 2008

On Working

(Back to the old template.)

I asked a second year who interned at the fund I am going to be with this summer what the hours were like. While a 60 hour week is supposed to be a light load (in light of the alleged 70-100 hours worked by others), it fills me with dread. Baby Y will be sleeping when I leave and ready for bed when I come home. It sounds awful.

My talk about the doability of working motherhood is a bit of a farce given that being a student is quite a different matter from actual work. While I am insanely stressed and busy all the time, at least I can be busy and stressed at home mostly, rather than in an office far from Baby Y.

Well, better to experience it in a summer internship rather than a full-time job committment. If it's a disaster, I'll know that I have to do something less time intensive (what on earth that could be given my career ambitions, I don't know). I often feel that it wasn't right for me to have a child - if you want the truth. And yet I want more children. (Overpopulation be damned.) I don't want to settle for a career that bores me in return for fewer/more flexible working hours. But I want to see my son. I feel really anxious and worried about my summer to put it mildly. And I don't really know who to talk to about it - how to figure out what to do ... it will work itself out but right now I feel weary of thinking about this issue.

5 comments:

DreamingLady said...

Hi, thanks for your comment on my recent update. When I came to your blog, I am so surprised by how much you already did and how much you are doing. You are a great model for MBA mom model. I feel bad that I cannot keep up with my blog compared with you.

I wish you have fun in the summer. and your boy looks so cute!

The.Grey.One said...

Hope it all works out well for you. Maybe thinking through and getting the priorities in life in order would help. Coming up with definite broad goals on what you want ultimately from your career -- whether it be money, fame, power, knowledge (skills) -- will help you achieve those goals in a more flexible career. Yes, at the end of internship you would know for sure what you want to do. All the best for your Internship.

Samantha said...

Good point about not wanting to have a job that you don't really like, even if the hours are good. I'd be curious to hear how you feel after the summer.

--an aspiring mba student who wants a gaggle of 4 someday!

cora said...

I can totally understand your dilemma. I am going to attend MIT Sloan this fall, with 2 young children. My choice of future careers will be heavily influenced by the working hours and how flexible they can be. Hang in there! Love your blog. Feel free to email me personally if you want to chat more about the challenges of getting an MBA as a mom...there are so few of us.

cora said...

email: cora at mit